How Luke Perry’s Death Reminds Me of My Toxic Relationships

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Luke Perry is dead and my heart is aching.

I was in the middle of a writing an e-mail for work when social media delivered the devastating news of Luke Perry’s tragic passing. While my sadness is a normal reaction to the loss of one of my teenage crushes, his death tells me something deeper about myself:

I love falling in love with jerks.

Seconds after I found out the news, I gushed my despair to a couple close girlfriends. Our shock quickly turned into a conversation about all the a**holes we used to love.

Dylan McKay was sexy, broody, and didn’t care what anyone else thought. He represented everything my boring, regimented childhood didn’t.

I know I’m not alone here.

Beverly Hills, 90210 premiered when I was nine years old and ended when I was nineteen, the formative angsty years when teenage heartthrobs are marketed to embody the type of man you desire.

Did I fall for toxic men because I was…